No, the Baby Has Not Arrived -- an FAQ

People tend to ask me the same questions, so I figure I can answer some basics here.

When is the baby due?
Two days ago (25 May). Due-dates, however, are 40 weeks after LMP and statistically there's less than 5% chance of a delivery on that exact day. There is, however, a 90% likelyhood that it will happen within two weeks of that date. [1]
Is it a boy or a girl?
Boy.
What's his name?
You'll find out during the birth announcement.
Should I call you to find out if the baby is born?
No, that's a terrible idea. Katie and I both hate the phone even when there isn't a child on the way. We hate it more when we're trying to relax before the baby is born. If you absolutely need to get in touch with us, try text or email.
Is there anything we can do?
Before the birth:
Play with our cat, he's needy and needs more attention than anyone can give him.
After the birth:
Email me if you are serious, there's plenty.
How is Katie feeling?
Tired - but she blogs in more detail.
Are you nervous?
No. I am not terribly excited about the sleep disruption, but I'll manage.
Excited?
Yes. I'm excited. Think of every cliché thing about new dads -- that's what I have.